Why Digital Connection Is Making You Lonely (And How to Deepen Your Relationships)

Psychotherapist, Esther Perel, said it best. We need to start talking about the new AI, Artificial Intimacy.

In a world dominated by digital interactions, the essence of true human connection seems to be fading away. As we navigate through the vastness of social media and the allure of impressive metrics – millions of impressions, thousands of comments and likes – we can easily become distracted from what truly matters: authentic human connection.

A recent poll conducted by the American Psychiatric Association reveals a startling truth: one in three individuals aged 18-34 identifies as lonely. This statistic is not just a number; it’s a reflection of a broader societal issue. The same survey indicates that half of all respondents attempt to numb their feelings of loneliness through social media. This approach, however, is akin to placing a band-aid on a deep wound; it might cover the issue temporarily, but it doesn’t address the root cause.

The irony is palpable. In an era where we’re more connected than ever before, why is it that feelings of isolation and loneliness are on the rise? The answer lies in the quality of our connections. Social media, for all its advantages, often serves as a platform for artificial interactions. It’s time to acknowledge a hard truth: if the connections we form online wouldn’t show up for us during our darkest days, can they truly be considered meaningful?

This brings us to a crucial juncture. Recognizing the loneliness epidemic that surrounds us, it’s imperative that we take steps to cultivate genuine relationships, both in and outside of our work environments. How, you might ask? By embracing the real over the virtual, the deep over the superficial.

Here’s a three-step challenge designed to foster real connections in your life:

1. Digital Detox: Once you clock out from work, put your phone in a place that’s out of reach and commit to not looking at it for at least two hours. Use this time to engage in activities that nourish your mind and present opportunities for in-person interaction.
2. Reconnect with an Old Friend: Life has a way of getting busy, and it’s all too easy to let valuable friendships slip through the cracks. Challenge yourself to schedule a catch-up with an old friend before the end of the month. Whether it’s a coffee date or a simple phone call, the act of reconnecting can have a profound impact on your sense of belonging.
3. Make a New Friend: Step out of your comfort zone and reach out to someone new, not with a business agenda, but simply to get to know them. This could be a colleague you’ve never spoken to outside of work or someone from your professional network on LinkedIn. The goal is to build a connection that transcends professional interests.

The drive towards real, meaningful connection is not just about combating loneliness; it’s about enriching our lives with relationships that bring joy, support, and a sense of community. It’s about remembering that behind every screen, there’s a human being craving genuine interaction just as much as you are.

Do you work remotely and miss genuine connection? Learn about my 1:1 coaching sessions for employees.